You finally did it!
You put yourself out there!
After all you’re totally a catch, what could go wrong?
Well only one thing really: rejection.
The fear of rejection often holds us back from acting on our feelings and intuition to pursue someone or something we’re attracted to.
And once you DO work up the courage to act in the face of that fear, and it doesn’t work out…
Well it just plain sucks!
Rejection is never a pleasant feeling. That sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach is real, but I promise it’s not forever.
Here’s how to regroup and move forward with your head held high:
1. Feel it
I’ve never been great at letting myself feel emotions, particularly negative ones.
I try to just shove them down and distract myself.
But now I recognise that there’s value in letting myself feel and process sadness, disappointment, and rejection.
I don’t have to change or fix it, I can just let it be and realise that it won’t last forever.
2. Check in with your values, wants, wishes and dreams
Here’s a thought: every relationship that doesn’t work out is only bringing you closer to the one that does.
But now is the time to check in with your values, and reassess what you want in life and a relationship.
Your values, wants, goals and dreams should be something you constantly reassess every few months.
You want these things to be front of mind so they drive your daily actions.
You don’t get what you wish for, you get what you work for in life, work, and relationships.
3. Do not allow your loneliness to lower your standards
Read that again!
Do not allow your loneliness to lower your standards.
Do you really like him or do you like the idea of him?
Did his actions really portray that he was the right kind of guy for you or is your brain fixating on the ‘highlight reel’ of your time spent together.
When we’re in a dark place and feeling lonely there’s a greater risk of us lowering our standards.
Maybe you think about sleeping with him again, or try to craft up a way to get another date when he’s clearly demonstrated he’s not interested?
But it’s not the solution. Don’t act out of desperation. You deserve better than that.
Once you’ve done all of the above, take some time out, hang with your girlfriends, prioritise self-care and I promise that very soon you’ll be feeling like your damn good self again.
For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, so maybe rejection is just the precursor to the future reception of love you deserve.
Hope this helps