Let’s face it, being swept off your feet by your dream guy seems like something that only happens in Hollywood,
and in today’s modern digital society, it just isn’t the way it works.
Guys just don’t seem to comprehend that the quick glance over your shoulder was actually a sign that you are into him (is he blind? What else could that possibly mean?).
Knowing how to consciously use your body to communicate to the cute guy at the bar can really help to up the odds that he will get the hint and come over and say hi.
It’s both superficial and scientific: in today’s dating world, where you look, how you smile, the way you stand and how you stare at your phone speak volumes about the type of woman you are.
It gives an indication on what is going on in your head and guys may not always be in tune with it, but it helps them to make a judgement call on whether to approach.
So, to help you along, here are The Social Collective’s top 5 tips on how you can make your body do all the talking.
1. Confidence in Posture
I think ladies often forget how powerful posture can be. How you stand, walk and carry yourself will definitely have an impact on how a man will initially receive you.
Next time you’re out and about conduct a quick body scan; Are you slouching, shoulders dropped forward and looking at your phone with resting bitch face (it’s a thing), or Are you standing strong with your head held high, shoulders back, chest up, making eye contact, smiling and looking like an approachable, strong confident woman?
Do yourself a favour ladies and get your positive posture on, you don’t often get a second chance to make a first impression.
Let him know your value at first glance and make it easy for him to meet your eye.
2. Be open and inviting, make it easy for them to approach.
In a nutshell, don’t stand in a tight circle with your lady friends looking anywhere but at him gossiping about things only your group would know about.
It’s intimidating for guys, even for the most confident of men (and it’s probably not the most confident man in the room that you want to approach you).
Dare to be different, try a horse-shoe formation instead of a circle, or break the big group up into a few fun looking small groups across different tables.
Take the time to look social, better still, actually be social! Talk to the guys and girls around you, chat to the bar tender like he’s your best mate; act like you own the place and your body will follow by looking more comfortable, approachable, open and friendly.
3. Make the approach
IT’S TIME TO TAKE ACTION!
There are far too many ladies today who just stand around talking about men and not enough ladies pulling the trigger and actually talking to men. Which one are you?
Step up your game ladies, take a deep breath, put a smile on your face and go on over and break the ice.
This is the first step in the flow of interaction and trust me when I say the more you do this the easier it gets.
Now stop staring at him and go over and talk to him already.
4. Talk with your hands
We’ve talked about how being incredibly social, open, inviting, having a strong confident posture and taking action will help with first impressions, but don’t let that initial spark wear off by not knowing what to do with your hands.
Learning how to use small gestures will speak volumes when it comes to holding and engaging his attention.
Keeping your hands open and using them to emphasise points in your conversation will not only demonstrate that you are a confident and engaging speaker but will also help you to be more expressive, an important factor for rapport building.
Letting your hand brush his arm or touching him to make a point will give him a fast clue that you’d like to do more than chat.
5. Think about your environment
By now you are probably well on the way to becoming that cheeky charmer, having him eating out of the palm of your hand. However nothing puts him on show more than ignoring or unconsciously turning your back on your friends and his mates.
Make sure that you are fully aware of what your body is doing in your environment.
Do you have your back to his best mate or have you accidentally ignored your girlfriends that you came out with?
It’s so important to manage the expectations of the people you are both with; acknowledge his friends or offer to bring your groups together; not respecting the social surroundings could become a sure fire way of creating an unwanted awkwardness that will probably lead to him or you needing to exit the conversation prematurely.
So there you have it ladies, a few simple tips on body speak that you can try today….